Wednesday, September 30, 2009

A LIST OF THINGS

So many things going on. Things that happen. Unexpected things. Things one does not find a reason for. Things one would wish would not had happened. New things that happen because those unexpected and apparently terrible things laid the ground for them. Unreasonable things to my eye. Things I wished would have turned out another way. Things and people that motivate you to overcome those obstacles. Things one is willing to fight for. Things and people one would not change for anything in the world. Real things. Things that make you happy. And other things that can make you cry. Things. All kinds of things. Things. My life is made out of things. Things that shape my character. Things that have made of my personality what it is today. Things that interact with me. So many things. I want to understand those things. None of those things will push me back. None of those things will keep me from trying. New things. I want new things. I want to explore things. I want to learn new things. I do not like things that do not change. I want changing things. Evolving things. New things.

I will create a list of things that have touched my life. I'll try doing it as comprehensive as my memory and patience allow me to. Things in historical order. Things. Bad things and Good things. Though maybe as I go analyzing them, I might not find any bad things. Things that seemed inexplicable and made me question God as to why they were happening, I might be surprised to realize they needed to happen. Of course, if these things would not have happened, things would have turned out another way. But because things happened the way they did, new things turned out to be even better. And I am happy for those things. And I will be happy for even those bad things. I am sure of this and I will try to probe myself this to be the case. My things. Good things.

5 comments:

Danielle said...

I love this.

I think about this a lot--the fact that those things which are difficult while I'm in the midst of them, ultimately shape my character and "self." Even the tough things I look back on with a kind of gratefulness, recognizing that the person I am today is a result of ALL the things I've experienced.

I've thought about doing a similar exercise in the past. I've never brought myself to do it because it seems so daunting. At the same time, I know that everything we experience is interconnected and meaningful for a larger, over-riding purpose and reason, and I'm sure you will discover it as you revisit your past!

Ju said...

nice idea. it pays to think of all those things - good, bad, indifferent - as part of a staircase, upwards. you can't get too drawn into analysis, though, for down that road lies madness ;)

but to consciously seek to understand the fabric of your life...i think it's a worthwhile exercise :)

Apfel said...

Tool - Parabola (si vas a escucharla... se escucha primero Parabol, y despues Parabola... es una cancion dividida, basicamente).

We barely remember, who or what came before this precious moment.
We are choosing to be here, right now. Hold on, stay inside...
This holy reality, this holy experience. Choosing to be here in...

This body. This body holding me. Be my reminder here that I am not alone in
This body, this body holding me, feeling eternal all this pain is an illusion.

Alive....

In this holy reality, in this holy experience. Choosing to be here in...

This body. This body holding me. Be my reminder here that I am not alone in
This body, this body holding me, feeling eternal all this pain is an illusion.

Twirling 'round with this familiar parabol
Spinning, weaving 'round each new experience.
Recognize this as a holy gift and celebrate this
chance to be alive and breathing,
a chance to be alive and breathing.

This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality.
Embrace this moment. Remember; we are eternal,
all this pain is an illusion.

schamton said...

Da y Ju :) gracias por los mensajes. la verdad es que ya empece a escribir la lista el otro dia... son muuuchas cosas las que pasaron, y espero no olvidarme de ninguna... aunque lo dudo...
me preocupa que la lista que resulte sea tan abarcativa y con tantos detalles personales que no pueda publicarla en el blog :P .. si pasa eso, se las mando por email ;)

schamton said...

Alan, la letra esta buena. la cancion no. y como en una cancion solo escucho la cancion y nunca le presto atencion a la letra, entonces le doy un 4